In Part I of this little series we explored how to break up. Now we will talk about when to break up. If you don't have time to read, the short answer is NOW!
The Relationship Year
The book of Ecclesiastes says "there is a time for everything and a season for every activity..." We all associate Spring with the season of love. New relationships crop up in the spring time for many reasons. People are outside again. Women wear open-toed shoes. Men get big tax refunds to make good first impressions. Most importantly, Spring follows the end of "break-up season".
Have you ever noticed the relationship year? Spring time you meet new people. Summer time you have loads of fun with those new people and start to narrow down your options. Fall is the "election" period and you are in a rush to get a boo and nestle down for the Winter months. Around the end of October you realize you may have chosen wrong so you're in a mad rush to break up before Thanksgiving. Why? Nobody wants to break up between Thanksgiving and Valentine's Day. It's impossible to win that one. You either end up looking cheap because you don't want to buy a gift for the holidays or feeling cheated because you didn't get a gift for the holidays. It's the equivalent of breaking up with someone right before their birthday. You don't do it.
Break Up Season
Many of us live happily through the relationship year multiple times. But when (and if) that dreaded time comes to end the relationship you are now in the cycle mentioned above. So, if you are in a relationship that is no longer meeting your needs and you want to get out - get out now! If you are not married then you're willingly and unnecessarily prolonging a relationship that is going nowhere. Spring is coming and it is high season for those shopping in the new market. If you wait until summer, you may still score but there will be more competition as everyone has already built their rosters for fall.
My advice is to get it over with now - before wedding season begins. You are going to need a date for all of these Spring/Summer weddings and if you don't break off your relationship you're going to be stuck taking your current friend with you. Thereby making it harder to break up after witnessing a wonderful celebration of love. You better hurry. Break up season is almost over. Those skilled break-up artists managed to somehow end it around the third week of January - far enough from New Year's and not that close to Valentine's Day.
But Seriously Folks...
The time to break-up is always NOW. Don't fear change. Besides, it is not fair to the other person. You are a hindrance to their ability to find lasting love. You are blocking your own opportunity to find someone that you can love and build a life with that person. Muster up the courage. Trust God to shape your life and move forward. With a pure heart, wish your current mate the very best and walk away gracefully. In a few weeks there will be droves of women in short skirts wearing platform sandals and men wearing designer sunglasses driving new cars waiting for you. Tell 'em Kamryn sent you.